FRIENDSHIP-AND-DATING

Is there such a thing as whispers of the heart? Maybe there is. For some, it may just be a plain and nice expression of language. For others, it may mean nothing else but simple words put together to create what they call some compound words. For me, however, it is a way of expressing some inner sentiments that go beyond accidentals and externalities. More than we ever know, the heart has its own language that we can hardly grapple or understand at times. That is why, St. Exupery says in the Little Prince, "It is only with the heart that one sees rightly."

Love, as we know it, is generally labelled as the language of the heart. When you love someone, you are not really able to explain in any mathematical formula or scientific terms why you feel the way you do. You just feel the excitement of being in love beyond measure; there is the sense of joy being encompass. Talk about so called "sleepless nights" and dreaming of some fantasy world when you are in love. The truth is, you are not in any way living in the world of schizophrenia when you feel this way. Such sentiments, however, though unexplained, become your common language. It is just the way the heart is.

It is said too that the heart has its reasons that the mind often don't understand. It is quite strange and ironic, just to think about it. At times there is a dialogical opposition between the mind and the heart. The heart says one thing, while the mind says another. They don't often coalesce peacefully together. They seem to have their own separate and independent minds. The mind cannot dictate on the heart, but sometimes the heart can dictate on the mind. How strange.

Love is indeed a very strangest thing. When you love someone it occupies everything about you. It involves the core of your being. It is like a magnet that draws the sand to you uninterruptedly. Sometimes, even if you want to get out from such a situation, but the attraction is so forceful that you cannot easily retract. Love often defies logic and reason. That is why people often wonder why two people who maybe at opposite ends in terms of external, physical appearance can be so in love with one another. So the expression says, "beauty lies on the eye of the beholder." Everyone of us see things differently. Our folks used to tell us that if you are in love, "everything is beautiful." I guess, there is some truth to this statement.

When you love someone, you have a binding obligation for that someone. The Little Prince speaks of being responsible forever for what you have tamed. This binding obligation entails respect, care, emotional support, responsibility, and nurturing space. Love, however, is not something suffocating. It should not be. Because love, if it is truly love, is something freely given, and it is also something freely accepted. True love involves a dialogical interpenetration of beings. It is not just an exchange of emotional sentiments. It is an interchange and acceptance of persons, of beings, of values, of characters, of the whole personhood of one another. That is why, true love goes beyond the sentiment of feelings and emotional exchange.

When you love someone, it entails no limit. When one says, "I love you," it means "I love you all the way without any reservation." There is no such thing as "I love you only half way." That is why I hate the expression "I love you until further notice." Such an expression defies any true sense of love. For true love cannot be measured by time and space. As the song says, "Love is forever." When you put a limit on love, then it is not love anymore.

Love is something that goes beyond the language of man. When you try to describe it, it defies you and loses its meaning. It is something indescribable, and yet it is something real. It is something you dream, and yet you already feel it in your guts. Love is such an irony. It is mysterious and defiant as well. It is what it is when you think it is not, and it is not when you think it is. In a true sense, you don't need to speak the words of love when you love someone. Love speaks for itself.

That is why, when love beckons you - you cannot defy it, or run away from it. Let love flow into your heart and into your soul. Live love and you will find the beauty and wonders of life.